For the record....

Over the last 71/2 months, I have received tons of positive and supportive feedback from family, friends and strangers regarding Aimée’s adoption. People are clearly happy for the both of us and want to share in our joy. Strangers sometimes come up to us and want to know about Aimée. I am happy to share our story with them. Aimée, after all, is my favourite topic of conversation. There is one type of response, however, (although well meaning) that really gets to me. It is when some people hear that she was from an orphanage. Sometimes they cringe, sometimes they say things like “poor babe” or simply “Oh no…”. Some people think she is Chinese and make comments on how terrible it is that girls are not valued. Yesterday, a woman said to me “It is so sad the way these babies are unloved and just discarded”.
Oufff! I can’t even put in words what that does to my heart.
For the record…. Aimée was not discarded.; nor was she ever, not even for a moment, unloved. This is not a naïve wishful statement… it is my experience. Whenever I think of the adoption process, I am truly amazed at how many people had Aimée’s best interest at heart. There was a team of people working hard, every single step of the process, to ensure Aimée would be loved and well cared for (her birthmother and birth family, the orphanage director, the agency, both governments, the nannies, the in-country facilitator, the social worker, and me of course). How many of us can say that we had as many people concerned with our care as children?
The orphanage was not a cold, dreary, evil place I imagined orphanages to be as a child (no thanks to movies such as “Annie” and “Oliver Twist“). I can’t speak for all orphanages, but I can speak for Aimée’s orphanage. It was relatively poor (by western standards) and simple, but DEFINITELY loving. It breaks my heart when I hear people say negative things about the orphanage, because I have seen how much the nannies and director care for these babies and go out of their way for them. I was there one afternoon when the older children came home from school. It was a very familiar scene, they came in giggling and chatting about their day, said hello to the babies and nannies and off they went to play. I remember feeling a bit surprised at just how normal it seemed. They were not unhappy children. Even the staff from housekeeping adore the babies. When Aimée was leaving the orphanage a lady kept coming around us and watching us. I was told she cleaned the nurseries and had become very attached to Aimée. I was so touched by how she held Aimée and said her goodbyes. The nannies wanted us to know exactly how the babies liked to be held, how they liked their bottles, how they ate, how to comfort them…. It was very obvious that these babies were loved tremendously and cared for as if they were their own children.
When I was in Vietnam, many people would tell me that Aimée was a lucky baby. I believe it to be completely true. Not because I am the one to adopt her. She is lucky to have so many people deeply love her and care for her. It is only fitting, that a girl with so much love in her life, be named Aimée (loved). Wouldn't you agree???

Aimée with lady from housekeeping

Aimée with some of her nannies